Notes on Parenting 210721

Help your children to develop disappointment muscle even if they become unhappy for some time.

When your child interferes in your work or conversation to seek attention, tell him that you love him but he needs to not interfere. So satisfy his seeking attention mode but be strict in enforcement. Be kind and firm. Connection before correction.

Don't be inconsistent with your expectations. For example allow one action and then disallow the same action another time.

If a child in insisting on something you want to discourage, don't give in even if he cries. After two minutes, give him alternate options. Most of the time, he will pick one of the options and stop crying.

Lead by example. If you want him to read, read. If you want him to avoid mobile, avoid yourself.

Children are not interested in the price of things you bring for them. They are happy that you brought something for them.

Notes on Spirituality 170721

Socrates was nearing his death. His disciples asked him, where would you like to be buried? He replied, you can bury me if you catch me. You can only bury my body, that you can bury anywhere. He was pointing to the concept of immortality.

There are many electric gadgets in the house like bulb running on the power of electricity. If a bulb says I am all powerful on my own, it is wrong. Just like that if I say that I am the doer, that is wrong. I am the all pervading soul, body is the doer.

There is an overload cutout built in our electricity supply. This ensures that connection with main supply is cut off when there is overload in some part. This ensures safety and prevents further damage to the main supply. Similarly when there is an emotional overload in our body like when we are angry, the cutout disconnects our brain to prevent further damage and to avoid leaving these episodes permanent scars on the mind.

There are five elements of nature. Earth, water, fire, air and space. Earth has all the five sense elements, so it is grossest. Shabd/sound, sparsh/touch, roopah/seeing, Rasa/taste and Gandha/smell. There is no smell in pure water, so it has four. There is no taste and smell in fire. Then air has only two, sound and touch. Space has only one, shabda. Space is the subtlest. Senses can work only in presence of sense objects. Both are made up of three Gunas, rajas, Tamas and saatvik.

Notes on Spirituality 110721

There is a difference between Saying I am There is a difference between saying, I am Sanjay gora and my name is Sanjay Gora. In former, you identify self as Sanjay Gora, in latter you identify body with Sanjay Gora and identify soul as different.

Everything in a dark room can be seen by a flashlight. But battery in the flashlight cannot be seen by the same light because battery is the source. Similarly everything in the world can be understood by the intellect but not the concept of soul, which is the source of the intellect.

If someone says he does not want to be happy at all times, sometimes he wants to be sad or unhappy like when watching sad movie or song. The counter is that he wants to be sad because it makes him happy.

Be like a tortoise in using your senses. Tortoise retracts its body parts under hard shell whenever it feels danger. Likewise we should withdraw and stay away from situations where our senses may be endangered. For example, a smoker trying to quit smoking,  should avoid groups where others are smoking. Because he may be tempted to smoke.

Lord Rama killed  Bali by hiding behind a tree. Because Bali represented lust and he had a boon that his opponent will lose half his power when facing him. So he could be killed only by hiding from him and lust.

Notes on Spirituality 020721

Heard this interesting interpretation of a Gita sloka in a podcast today. Out of three yoga's : karma yoga, gyan yoga and bhakti yoga, you can try to follow first two by actions or knowledge, But you can't plan to follow bhakti yoga. Bhakti is love for divine, it will happen when it has to happen. You just cannot inculcate bhakti forcefully.

Another concept shared was Shreyas and Preyas  (श्रेयस और प्रेयस) things. Preyas are things which may feel good but may not be good in reality. For example scratching your body may suppress the itch and feels good but excess scratching may harm the body. Preyas things are reverse. For example, doing exercise may not feel good but it is good for the body in the long term.